batteryorganic

my tummy hurts and so does my whole inside. 34 hours and 24 minutes until you will disappear to a place I can now never call home. It is my side of the story, your side of the story and then theres the third story we wish would have happened and I will keep wishing for but I dont think there will ever be such a story. An I do kind of wish Id never met you and I do kinda wish I could have the worst year of my life back, but I want things to get better and I forgive you for everything even thou you cant do the same.

 

Time for a midningstroll to see my unicorns. Also it is now 34 hrs & 16 mins 

until big things will happen!

 

back to Brighton in September. back to hating that place & back to a messy messy lifestyle. But I can´t stand Sweden & Swedish people anymore. Will miss my cats, unicorns & family tho.  

Today.. was not a very good day. I miss 2 years ago when I had fun & I saw my friends & I miss Julia & London and everything (& I miss Kai & Beautiful Brighton)

 

 

do you remember when we drank coffe in a glass with sugar and I didnt´t like coffe but then I started to. Do you remeber when we had a snowball fight and your trousers ripped? Do you remeber when I made crepes with preserve? Do you remeber when we had hour long conversations in the evenings while you made me food? Do you remeber when you texted me in the middle of the night from a bar in Shoreditch listening to "dark side of the moon" with you friend? Do you remember taking me there? Do you rember when we walked around Brick Lane all day to find some bar but it turned out the bar was a bit odd (and we noticed it was now a very very gay bar) and I had a coffe and you had a Guiness? Do you remember when we walked around Spitafields in the snowy evening ? Do you remember that autumn day with me standing on that staircase to the amazingly mouldy house in picadilly circus and you said I looked like I belonged there? I miss all of it 

 

this 

 

 

A weekend in London & this. Any takers on a weekend in London in September maybe?

 

 

I miss this day and I started to miss Brighton. bad desicions

I'm working my first proper shift in Har Rock tonight and I am really nervous (anxiety we love you) so if I don't update later tonight I probably died from an heartattack or got hit by a bus. I still hate desicions and I can't decide if im gonna go back to Brighton or move to London or stay here or do GodsGirls or do Suicidegirls or take this job in Hard Rock or go back to the countryside and this is all giving me really bad anxiety I wish i had someone to decide for me.

late nights with good music and lots of Tea are my favourites. It´s funny how I get really stressed about having to do one thing tomorrow and I would prefer to hide under my duvet and dream about a life I could have. If I made the effort. Or if I didn´t get anxiety problems about having a new job. I wish I could do what my heart tells me to

wu tang in the morning and situps to make yourself feel better and to pretend that anyone will ever see you. Because you don't like going out and it does make you anxious having to go to a shop and make decisions or even decide what to do of your day and when its too late you realise it wasn't actually that bad and you can dream about things that are and things you want to happen but will they ever if you just keep dreaming?

1-200 pressups/day

25 min walk to work & a vegetarian diet (always)

no sugar or alcohol, my only naughty is Tea w. Milk&Honey